Tuesday, October 30, 2007


I know for those who have visited this blog (blahg?) have been disappointed. Perhaps, even a little offended, turned off, etc. As of yet I have written next to nothing, except a stray comment on a few other blogs. However, it is difficult at times to share some of the things that are on my mind. As a pastor people look to me to be the calm, reserved, professional, spiritual, dignified, mature person that is the stereotypical "pastor". I might be tempted to say I am sorry to disappoint, but will not for I am not.

God has called me to the ministry and He has called me as I am. Though called, "as I am," I know I am being transformed. I am being transformed from the same dirt as you, in the same world, by the same God. Yet my mind is frustrated for the transformation seems to stall. Is it my God? No, absolutely not! It is my pathetic selfishness and blatant disregard of what God has invested in me. I mean not to put myself down, but to wax with brutal honesty. Some may call this honesty self-destruction, I believe it is self-realization that is afforded by the indwelling Holy Spirit. It is this same Holy Spirit who affords me hope. Hope in the knowlege I am His, and not of my might, but His. Hope in the assurance I am not complete, and Christ is not done. Hope not in the temporal, but eternal. Hope not in my discovery, but His revelation. Hope not in what I know only in part, but will know in full. Hope in His Word not returning to Him void. The Word imparted to me, has defined me, has ransomed me, has redeemed me and is transforming me, but is it as it should?

I hope for this blog to be my place of release and sharing of thoughts passing in the ceaseless and turbulent tide which is my mind.